SECRET 1: Don't be your own worst enemy. Henry Ford said:
"Most of the bars we beat against are our own. We put them there,
and we can take them down." Instead of whipping yourself over mistakes,
ask yourself, "What can I learn from this?" Then get out of the
rearview mirror and back into making your life better.
SECRET 2: Life is difficult and unfair; get used to it.
College is more difficult than high school; life is more difficult
than college. Every increase in the degree of difficulty let's you
experience the satisfaction of mastering that next level. As you
stretch your mental and relationship muscles, they will work even
better for you. Maturity and true optimism come from a track record
of overcoming increasingly tough obstacles. You have what it takes
to overcome life's difficulties; prove that to yourself.
SECRET 3: Instead of caring about your self-esteem, most
people are worried about themselves. Find your own inner appreciation
for what you do well. You won't be good in all areas, so don't copy
the dreams of others. Turn your God-given gifts into a way to make
meaning and enough money. You may be winning and not know it if
you are not keeping score; keep track of your successes in a daily
journal.
SECRET 4: Develop a sense of gratitude. You are not entitled
to a great job with a high salary, a perfect partner or an easy
life. Be thankful for what life gives you every day. When you expect
less, you are happier when you achieve more. The next time you feel
like calling a pitty party, write down your blessings instead of
your problems.
SECRET 5: Don't settle for easy teachers or mentors; be
excited by the ones that challenge you. When I went from being a
great student in high school to being challenged in college, I realized
an important truth-your best and most caring teachers are the ones
that care enough to challenge you. They believe you have something
great inside you, and they call for it to surface. After all, if
you think your teacher is tough, wait until you have a boss.
SECRET 6: Be nice to your parents along the way. Before
you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They
got that way from cleaning up after you and listening to your frequent
complaints! Your parents are doing the best they can. So the next
time you feel like being upset with them, remember that they love
you and you love them! The older you get the more you will appreciate
them. You might as well start now.
SECRET 7: Don't believe everything they tell you in college.
Some of your professors may have done away with winning and losing,
but Life has not. Some may actually believe that America is the
biggest problem in the world instead of the champion of liberty
and economic opportunity that holds the world together. They may
try to tell you that all moral choices are relative, and there is
no standard of right and wrong. These opinions don't bear the slightest
resemblance to anything in real life.
SECRET 8: Be nice to all the people you meet along the
way. It isn't just what you know in life that will get you ahead;
it is how you treat others you live and work with. Nice people do
get ahead. Manners are the lubricating oil of relationships. If
you learn that now, it will pay off throughout life.
SECRET 9: Cultivate your faith. People may try to convince
you that God does not exist. Many intellectuals think that their
minds are vastly superior to centuries of faith experience. God
will be near you all the way through your coming years whether you
acknowledge Him or not. He patiently waits for your prayers, for
your study of His word, and for your presence at a faith community
of your choice. Meet Him half way.
SECRET 10: Laugh a lot. Take your school, your homework,
and your career choices seriously, but always take yourself lightly!
People like being with people who smile and make them laugh. Remember
that the safest target for your humor will always be yourself. When
you laugh at yourself before others do, you win!
None of us take advantage of all of these secrets, but it's worth
trying. Make memories, make a difference and enjoy the journey.
We all want you to succeed.
Terry Paulson, Ph.D., from Agoura Hills, CA, is a professional
speaker on making change work and author of The Dinner: The Political
Conversation Your Mother Told You Never to Have